Brian Urlacher’s Live Game Commentary Isn’t Everybody’s Favorite

by Shea Johnson on Wednesday 2 December 2009 at 8:00 pm

So, Brian Urlacher said some things on Monday. Clearly, it was all said out of frustration. Naturally, everyone was appalled. Apparently, Warren Sapp thinks Urlacher should shut up. Obviously, David Haugh believes that it’s no way for a team captain to act. And … wait, what the hell did he even say, again?

Yahoo!’s Michael Silver spent three whole days with Urlacher to see how the other side lives. By other side, I mean extremely wealthy football players with little to do. Silver discovered that they do the following: sneak up behind young women in an effort to scare them, slam on the brakes and scream while driving on the expressway in an effort to scare their passengers, and say horrible, horrible things about the team they’re too wounded to play for. What!

While Silver watched on, and likely asked to be taught how to “sneak up” on a girl, Urlacher seemingly writhed about as his team repeatedly fell and failed their way to an embarrassing 36-10 spanking against Minnesota. In what was surely in the heat of the moment, Urlacher made a couple of real-time observations in regards to the game: Kyle Orton is a winner, the defense can’t cover anyone, and lately, Matt Forte isn’t making many people miss. Oh, and just for fun, he added: watching crappy football teams play crappy and not being able to do anything to help “sucks”. The nerve!

So, by now, you’ve probably realized all the shit mostly everyone seemed annoyed at Urlacher for saying publicizing is, indeed, true. And most of the criticism he’s received because of it has to do with the why and not the what. But, give the guy a break. He was followed for three whole fucking days. He likely had his guard down. It wasn’t like Silver caught him in the locker room, post game, and said, “so, tell me what you think about the Bears, asshole?” And you all know what being around someone for three whole days can feel like. Seriously, raise your hand if you didn’t fart in front of your girlfriend after spending three consecutive days together for the first time. Silver’s lucky Urlacher didn’t jack off with the bathroom door open by the second night. They did share a bed, right?

The point is, Urlacher didn’t say anything that everyone didn’t already know; He didn’t say it with mal intent; He didn’t come off like a douche bag. Plus, as a Bears fan, it must be particularly refreshing to hear honest reflection from a member of the organization every once and a while.

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Comments (3)

Posted under Mouthing Off,brian urlacher

3 Comments

by ditkavsworld — December 2, 2009 @ 10:55 pm
You’re absolutely right, it was nice to hear someone besides myself say the Bears suck right now. Why sugar coat it? That’s Lovie’s problem always saying the same bullshit. “We got a lot of football left, we get off the bus running, Rex is our QB, Bob Babich is our water boy, blah blah blah.
by Heather — December 3, 2009 @ 12:57 pm
It’s funny that people are actually getting all riled about what Urlacher said. As a matter of fact, I’m sure they’ve all been saying the exact same things since before last monday’s game. Guess what, the truth hurts. If they can’t handle the smack talk, maybe they should go watch some ballet. All we can do is hope that Lovie whips his coaches into shape and in turn, get the players doing what they need to do to win.
by Shea — December 3, 2009 @ 9:59 pm
If they can’t handle the smack talk, maybe they should go watch some ballet.

Why, is there not a lot of shit-talking involved in ballet? I’ve never been. … Hi, Heather!